Well here I am, approaching my 19th week of pregnancy (eeek! that's almost halfway people!) and have yet to write one thing about it. I am disappointed in myself. I really wanted to track this journey for myself and my child. I think it would be neat if I could go back now and read my mom's thoughts on being pregnant with me. But, there is no sense in dwelling on the past! So, for this entry I am going to start at the beginning and work my way to the present.
I went of the birth control at the beginning of February. This was not a "yay we're gonna make a baby now!" move, it was a "crap, I guess I better do this before Robert starts hiding my birth control" which he had threatened to do. Wanna know how I told him?
Ahh, yes, the ever personal IM, that the stinker didn't even respond to! Now, let me state this, my husband did not force me off my birth control, he did not force me to get pregnant or anything terrible like that. I knew from early on that kids for Robert was a deal breaker and I decided that I wanted Robert more than I wanted to cling to my fear of having kids. Simply put, I hate change. Anyone who knows me can attest to that, it's actually kind of a joke around my office. Have kids is a big change. I know everyone says it's a great change and your life is so much better after it, but still, it's change.
The next question might be "well why so soon? you guys have not even been married a year." Very good question, imaginary person! I knew Robert was ready, heck Robert has been ready for probably over 3 years. I know myself, I knew I was never going to say "yes, I am ready for this" there was always going to be something else I wanted to do first, something else I wanted to get paid off first, some trip I wanted to take first. Well my prescription for BC was ending soon and I took that as my cue to stop stalling. Plus, Robert wants three (!!!) kids and if for some crazy reason I agree to that, we need to get a move on!
So, back to February and going off BC. We decided to not actively try but just to kind of see what happens, plus Robert was against having a holiday baby for fear of them getting the raw end of the deal later in life with b-days. Also, we were going on a cruise in April and neither one of us wanted me pregnant for that, especially during that 1st trimester time. So, I kind of figure out my "prime times" and shoo Robert away during those times. (Sorry baby if you are reading this in 16 years!) Then we get back from the cruise and bam less than a month later I am knocked up!
The few months that I had been off the BC, I had been SUPER regular, so I knew something was up when my estimated start date came and went. I kind of started freaking out, but decided to chalk it up to my body still working the BC out of my system. May 14 we were at the
Americana Music Jam and during a break I started going over my calendar from February till then and decided that's it, I'm pregers. I tell Robert and he kind of blows me off, but when we leave that night he heads straight to a drug store to buy the most expensive pregnancy test they have. We get home and I take the test, leaving it lying face down on the rug around the toilet. Robert finally goes in and looks at and it says "Not Pregnant." Huh? But I'm late, I haven't started, what's going on? So, over the next week I take several more tests and they all say negative, the whole time Robert is saying "you're pregnant, you're pregnant." Around the 24th/25th I finally call my doctor and tell her what's going on and she tells me to come in for a test. So, I go in pee in a cup and again another negative. (Sidenote: for someone who was really unsure about being ready to get pregnant, I sure was tired of seeing those negatives and getting more and more sad each time!) My doctor tells me that she can do a blood test to measure something in my blood and that I am even a week pregnant it should show up. According to all the online calculators etc my prime time was the end of April beginning of May, so I should be at least three weeks pregnant by then, long enough for a HPT to pick it up! I ok the blood test. The next day I get a call from the doctor, again negative. By this point I am starting to freak out that there is something wrong with me. And that all of a sudden I have stopped having my period. And all the doctors office call tell me is that I have to miss three periods before anything can be done. Gah, three months is a long time to wait this out!
That weekend was Labor Day and Robert had family coming into town, so that helped distract me some from freaking out, but not completely. That weekend something happened that Robert once again preaching "you're pregnant, you're pregnant." It's a slightly personal thing, soo, I think I will refrain from posting that here! Well on the 31st, after all his family left I decided to go use one of the last three HPT I had. It was one of the cheaper ones that just has the lines on it. I had gotten so used to them just popping up negative that I had quite turning them upside down on the toilet rug. So, I am sitting there staring at it and slowly a very faint line starts to appear. And that's it, I mean, I am talking the lightest line ever, at least it feels that way to me. Well, I decide to just put it in a drawer and go on about my day. That evening I go and use one more test, this time a strong pink line. I finally show them to Robert who gets mad at me for wasting the tests! I still never really got an explanation on that, maybe it was just because he had "known" for so long? The next morning I use the last test, a fancy digital one, boom, "pregnant." I call my doctor from the office and tell them and go in for another blood test which they call and confirm that I am indeed pregnant the next day. Crazy right? Normally it's about two weeks from the deed until you can get results on a HPT so that would mean I got pregnant around the time of my missed period. It still drives me nuts that I do not know when conception was. I have heard/read so many stories of girls who know the exact minute it happens, and I don't know that.
I went in for my first prenatal appointment a few weeks later and the doctor was just as baffled as I was on exactly how far along I was, it was either 6 or 8 weeks. That is a big difference people! So she decided to send me for an ultrasound. On June 25th, my birthday, I got to see my baby for the first time. Talk about mind blowing. The ultrasound tech decided that I was around 8 weeks, which put conception back at the end of April/beginning of May. Why it took until the end of May for me to get a positive HPT? I still have no idea.
Much to Robert's dismay I decided to wait until at least 14 weeks to tell most people. He was ready to shout it to everyone, but I wanted to play it a little safer. We did make a few exceptions, we told Roberts family the weekend of 4th of July and my extended family that next weekend and then finally my parents two weekends after that, around the 26th of July.
Now, on to my 1st trimester and all that. I have to say my 1st trimester was pretty boring, which I am not complaining about! No morning sickness, no heartburn, no weight gain, no bigger boobs, not even much bloating. I was super tired all the time and finding myself running to the restroom all the time, but I think that was from all the extra water I was trying to intake. Also, I was starving all the time, but unable to eat a lot at one time, it was the weirdest. I hated the being tired the most, but when you're growing a baby it seems to zap a lot of your energy! Other than that the 1st trimester was a breeze!
I am now well into my 2nd trimester and things are still cooking along nicely. I have a lot more energy back. I am still working out, in fact I have yet to even gain a pound! I can tell that my weight has shifted as some of my pants feel a little snugger in the belly. Speaking of belly, mine is getting more firm! It's weird, my upper abdomen is getting really firm, uhh, don't you carry a baby lower in your belly area? Robert says it's because all my organs are being squished up to make room for baby that is the size of a sweet potato and my ureters that is apparently the size of a cantaloupe this week!
From now on my goal will be to update at least once a week, I'll shoot for Fridays. I'll tell you all about how we are going with nursery decorations and baby baking!
(Hopefully the rest of my posts wont be this long winded!)
